The Half-Hearted Detective

LOVE HIM TO DEATH

Before his heart attack Vinnie Altobelli was the best detective on the streets. Now, bounced from the force, he's walking on eggshells -- afraid of overexertion, sex and spaghetti carbonara. Whether he likes it or not, he's still getting too much of them all.

When smooth-talking Tony Pardo offers him a million bucks to find out who's trying to kill him, Vinnie doesn't say no. Pardo is Mob by way of Harvard, but even his good manners are no protection when bullets start flying in his lavish mansion.

Among the suspects are some unsavory houseguests, kinky servants and Pardo's two sisters -- the original femmes fatales. With machine guns stashed in dresser drawers and Pardo's cool blond wife breathing hot and cold, Vinnie's first job as a private eye is either a dream come true or a nightmare. The sex and drugs, knives and lies are all a menace to Vinnie, but they're nothing compared to the killer who pines to see him permanently rest in peace....