The Year My Life Went Down the Loo

Subject: The Grotty and the Fabu (No, its not a song.)
From: Mrs.Oded@btelecom.co.uk
To: Dru@seattlegrrl.com

Things That Really Irk My Pickle About Living in England
- The school uniform
- Piddlington-on-the-weld (I will forever be known as Emily from Piddlesville.)
- Marmite (It's yeast sludge! GACK!)
- The ghost in my underwear drawer (Spectral hands fondling my bras—enough said!)
- No malls! What are these people thinking???

Things That Keep Me From Flying Home to Seattle for Good Coffee
- Aidan (Hunkalicious!)
- Devon (Droolworthy? Understatement of the year!)
- Fang (He puts the num in nummy!)
- Holly (Any girl who hunts movie stars with me—and Oded Fehr will be mine—is a friend for life.)
- Uber-coolio Polo Club (Where the snogging is FINE!)