The Modern 22nd Century New Age Guide to Old Fashioned Baby Maintenance, Child Rearing and Parenting

Shelves are brimming with books that guide parents and want-to-be-parents down the parenting path. All of them telling you what to do. Do this. Do that. Do the other thing. But they never teach parents the truly important things about how to be a parent. Things like Test Parenting, Your Baby's Name and Life Expectancy, Baby Habitats: Managed Environment vs. Free Range, Home School Your Kid into a Cash Cow, and, When Should You Begin Lying to Your Children? all combined with original tips like: When your kids criticise your looks be sure to tell them that looks are hereditary and - Too lazy to Christmas shop? Buy your kid a bag of charcoal briquettes from the grocery store and tell them better luck next year.
The Modern 22nd Century New Age Guide to Old Fashioned Baby Maintenance, Child Rearing and Parenting by Alan Baggett. Your kid will never be the same. And neither will you.