The Journal of Jedediah Barstow

May 26, 1845

...it was Mr. Littleton who said to me I had some real important pondering to do and not much time to do it in. Just until tomorrow morning, in fact. I could go with the Richardsons or stay with the company. So I should think real hard, he said. "The question is," he said, "are you looking back to the States, or ahead to tomorrow?"

I climbed up the bluff to the grasses. Just me and the sun....

Ahead? Tomorrow? Can't think what that means. If I think about what's happened, I'm ready to turn back. I feel real angry at Pa. If he hadn't.... Never mind. I'll worry more on it later.