The Aquatic Adventures of The Ugly Mermaid

PLEASE NOTE: This book contains a tiny bit of 'toilet humour' - if words like ‘bottom-burp' and ‘boobs' offend then please do not purchase! The book has been tested on kids and grandparents (who generally love this kind of naughtiness), but the author requests you observe the above before buying ... Large format, illustrated, full colour. Fans of quirky, irreverent humour will squeal with delight at The Ugly Mermaid's aquatic adventure! ‘Why have the undersea gods forsaken me so, and left me with a face that's as lumpy as a toad's back? Why do my arms look like fat, tattooed saveloy sausages? What terrible, shameful thing have I done to end up this way, with my bristly belly of lard and facial jelly-moles the size of jellyfish? Why do my boobs droop like a seal's flippers, and why are my jowls so bearded and stubbly? I only want to be beautiful! I only want to be loved!' ... Join The Ugly Mermaid on a perilous undersea adventure like no other, as she struggles to break the terrifyingly evil Witch-Queen of the Abyss's cruel curse. FULL SELECTION OF BOOKS AT: www.hayesdesign.co.uk/books