Perkins of Portland

THERE was very little about Perkins that was not peculiar. To mention his peculiarities would be a long task; he was peculiar from the ground up. His shoes had rubber soles, his hat had peculiar mansard ventilators on each side, his garments were vile as to fit, and altogether he had the appearance of being a composite picture. We first met in the Golden Hotel office in Cleveland, Ohio. I was reading a late copy of a morning paper and smoking a very fairish sort of cigar, when a hand was laid on my arm. I turned and saw in the chair beside me a beaming face. "Just read that " he said, poking an envelope under my nose. "No, no " he cried; "on the back of it." What I read was: "Perkins's Patent Porous Plaster Makes all pains and aches fly faster."