More Than a Good Friend

In high school I made a deal with my best friend. If neither of us were married by 35, we'd marry each other. We haven't spoken about it since. So when he proposes at our party, I walk away. I've loved him forever, but he is just making good on a deal.I deserve better than that.So I get on every dating app I can and vow to change things. I'll meet someone new and forget about how much I love my best friend.That's my plan.But it veers a little off course when he gets protective about my dates and goes out of his way to spend time with me.I'm not sure what to think anymore.