A Call for a New Alphabet

X is exasperated. Every other letter in the alphabet has so much to do and plays such important roles in making words. X expects more. He calls for a vote on a new alphabet (gasp!). According to the Alphabet Constitution, X has every right to question the status quo. But the night before the vote, X is plagued by dreams of what could happen if he were to take on another letter's job. S has to run around a lot making singular words plural, except sometimes he isn't needed at all, and sometimes he needs to bring along another letter . . . it was all very confusing. Then X thought he'd like to be E. E was very important and very useful. E agreed. But E was exhausted. He was in thousands of words and constantly busy. X didn't think E's job was a good idea after all.